Trust is the foundation by which all relationships are built. We often trust ourselves enough to allow people into our personal and professional lives, and maintain that trust until it is broken. This is also a way that we unconsciously express respect for others that we invite by accepting who they are and what they do.
In romantic relationships, we begin much the same way. We may have been wronged or hurt in the past, though most of us are open enough to try again. The challenge comes over time in a couple of key ways:
1. If we have not forgiven others who have wronged us, or ourselves for having allowed the experience
2. We face the challenge of trusting when our current partner has broken the sacred bond through lying, sexual or mental infidelity, or other means.
Couples begin fighting when one partner or the other is not being heard (Stonewalling), as well as when one partner uses denigrating or hurtful remarks. It becomes a battle for power in the relationship and in attempt to be heard or recognized for what they contribute. Trust, then, becomes lost and each partner will begin to seek fulfillment elsewhere – work, family, or other relationships.
It’s important to know that Trust is not built during times of ease and flow. Trust is built during times of chaos and turmoil, when one partner is in dyer need of support and no matter how inconvenient it may seem, the other is there to fulfill that need. A level of respect for the other partner is acknowledged and trust begins to rebuild.
They key ingredient is being Present to the other persons needs. When we battle, we undermine the other partners needs in attempt to force them to understand our own. No matter how long you have been working on trust in your relationship, the second you lose respect and are not present for your partner, trust can be eliminated in that instant.
However, when we are present to other people’s needs, we ultimately become fulfilled ourselves. It’s an act of Love in it’s more Unconditional and Complete sense. We seek to actively listen to our partner without trying to solve their problems, but be there in support that they can resolve them, even if they just need to vent.
This portion of Reunite with Passion has created the most phenomenal results and sets the precedence for the duration of the program. Men, in particular, learn how to be fully present to their spouses needs, while the women (or the more feminine individual) learns to fully open up and express their concerns without fear of not being heard.
Support@HowardCramptonJr.com 661.524.6093 Howard Crampton, Jr. Int’l.